truth

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Mirror, Mirror

I realize that I make a whole lot of excuses for a whole bunch of things. The first time someone said this to me I became argumentative and defensive. I didn’t want to see myself as that person, when in fact, that’s who I am. I create excuses for my attitude; I justify my actions, and refuse to acknowledge this as an aspect of my personality. In moments like these, I refuse to see myself from any vantage point other than my own. This has been disastrous. I’ve created a one-dimensional view of my life, which has lead to stagnation and contentment.
There are an infinite amount of perspectives that exist in the world. Each individual has a unique perspective based on their reality and the things that they experience within that reality. For me to reject someone’s perspective is refusing to acknowledge the multitude of perceptions that exist within this universe. It

What If?

On my return flight to Newark from Atlanta, I had an epiphany; I live in a daily state of fear. Before boarding the flight, a family wanted to switch seats so that they could sit together. So I gave up my beloved window seat for an aisle seat. It made me extremely uncomfortable to not be sitting next to the window, but I didn’t notice it until we were landing. I like to look out the window to see while the plane is landing. I wasn’t going to be able to see during this flight and it didn’t help that the person sitting next to the window had the shade closed.
When the plane started to descend, I started to panic. What if the plane wasn’t able to lane, what if we had to continue circling around the airport, I imagined terrible possibilities of what could happen. Having my daughter with

Fancy Me Not

I don’t take great care of myself. I spend time caring for everyone else, but don’t spend nearly as much time caring for myself. I know that I have to take care of myself before I can take care of anyone else, but that’s been hard to do. I am managing several roles in my life and it’s gotten hard to manage. As a result, my self-care has been at an all-time low. I was doing the bare minimum to keep up with it, but that has caught up with me. I started to feel overwhelmed and stressed out.
I was barely making it to yoga classes and there were weeks that my practice has been nonexistent. So last week I was determined to squeeze some self-care in by any means necessary. Midweek, I headed to the beach with my daughter and two women friends. It was my daughter’s first trip

Uber Chronicles

I spent all of last week in Atlanta visiting my family and close friends. While I was there I had the pleasure of meeting a lovely woman named Charlene. She was my Uber driver to the airport to pick up a rental car. Charlene blessed my life during our ride Friday morning by being vulnerable and sharing her life story with me. She talked about her past and all it’s ugliness, losing friends and even family, but she also shared her glory. She’s married to a wonderful man that she said God blessed her with, is living in her dream house, and only drives for Uber to pay off credit cards she recently used to splurge for her husband’s birthday. She makes her own schedule, which allows her flexibility to do what she wants while still being able to spend time with her daughter. She’s enjoying life.
I said, “It sounds to me

Much Love

Last week my womanfriend and I were having a conversation about friendships and how our friendship has changed over the years. We’ve been friends since college and although there were periods of time that we didn’t speak as much, we always picked back up right where we left off. Each time engaging in elevating and stimulating conversation, that reminded us just why we are friends. We are always there for each other and we know that we can rely on one another regardless of where we are in life. We recognized, though, that all friendships aren’t created equal.
There are some friendships that aren’t built to withstand the busy spells, mood swings, and distant phases that come along as a result of adulting in life. Sometimes distance is created in friendships in order to elevate the progression of both individuals. I know I wasn’t always able to hold space for friends when

Social Privacy

Over the weekend my husband and I celebrated our daughter’s 1st birthday. It was also the first time I shared that I had a daughter on social media. When we found out that I was pregnant, we knew that we didn’t want to announce it on social media. At the time, we were already engaged and had not made a big announcement on social media. Only our closest friends and family knew of our engagement so of course our pregnancy wouldn’t be any different. I asked my mother how she announced her pregnancy to people when she was expecting with me.
I’m a very private person and didn’t want our good news to be shared with 1500+ people that I really didn’t know and that didn’t really know me. It was a personal, intimate, and very special moment in my life and I wanted to share the news with those that

Hard to Be Different

Last night, BET premiered the 10th Annual Black Girls Rock Awards show. During her acceptance of the Rock Star award, Rihanna encouraged girls to love themselves and accept who they are. Oh, if it was so easy!? Most people don’t even have insight into who they are in order to love themselves. In fact, many people reject parts of themselves out of fear of rejection, ridicule, and shame. Instead we turn a blind eye to the not-so likable parts of ourselves in order to be accepted for someone that we are not. In order to fully love ourselves, we must first recognize and acknowledge the good with the bad.
Unfortunately, we all were born into a world that sends contradictory messages about what it means to be you. We say that it’s what’s on the inside that counts, but what really matters is on the outside. Whole groups of people are

Mind Your Own Business

Social media has created a platform for people to run amuck, proclaim their pettiness, display their ignorance, and showcase a lack of sensitivity and compassion. I wanted to break down the notion of “minding your own business,” especially with the increase of social media drama that has flooded the Internet. “Mind” is an esoteric concept of present and awareness of self. To “mind your own business” essentially means to be aware of self. To be aware of self means to focus on self yet we sometimes get away from this and focus on other people. Relationships are sustained through our ability to trust one another and maintain a sense of loyalty. Chaos and conflict in relationships stem from the lack of one’s capability to mind their own business.
As much as many of us would like to say that we don’t focus on other people’s business, the fact is that anytime

Change in Direction

Life is one big movie! It is filled with ups and downs, hills and bumps,
laughter and excitement, joy and sadness. It’s a thriller, suspense,
drama, romance, comedy type of movie. It’ is all the genres packed into
one package that unfolds as your life’s movie. This is your motion
picture. Everything that is happening to you is for your greater good.
All you have to do is sit back and watch from the backseat. We don’t get
to watch it while it’s happening, although that would be great. Instead
we get to reflect back on things after they’ve already occurred,
contemplate different choices, and wonder about if things were
differently. This is the joy and excitement of life. 
There will be times in life that we will be re-routed from the current path in order to take an alternate route. During those moments, it may not appear to be reasonable to steer off course, but there

Free Yourself

In a previous post, The Road to Victory, I wrote about the continuous war that we experience along life’s journey. I did not mention in this post is that this war is an internal battle that takes place within our minds. These battles of the mind are not physical experiences, though it may often seem that way. We are presented with choices in a such a way that allows for us to make our own decisions (free will). Some people continue to make the same choices, taking the easy way out, doing what they’ve always done, and expect to get different results. These people have yet to recognize the instant of their behavior. They have not freed themselves from the bondage of the mind.
The mind is a very complex factor that we do not yet fully understand as human beings. Our minds play tricks on us, working for and against