life

tag (78 Posts)

Mirror, Mirror

I realize that I make a whole lot of excuses for a whole bunch of things. The first time someone said this to me I became argumentative and defensive. I didn’t want to see myself as that person, when in fact, that’s who I am. I create excuses for my attitude; I justify my actions, and refuse to acknowledge this as an aspect of my personality. In moments like these, I refuse to see myself from any vantage point other than my own. This has been disastrous. I’ve created a one-dimensional view of my life, which has lead to stagnation and contentment.
There are an infinite amount of perspectives that exist in the world. Each individual has a unique perspective based on their reality and the things that they experience within that reality. For me to reject someone’s perspective is refusing to acknowledge the multitude of perceptions that exist within this universe. It

What If?

On my return flight to Newark from Atlanta, I had an epiphany; I live in a daily state of fear. Before boarding the flight, a family wanted to switch seats so that they could sit together. So I gave up my beloved window seat for an aisle seat. It made me extremely uncomfortable to not be sitting next to the window, but I didn’t notice it until we were landing. I like to look out the window to see while the plane is landing. I wasn’t going to be able to see during this flight and it didn’t help that the person sitting next to the window had the shade closed.
When the plane started to descend, I started to panic. What if the plane wasn’t able to lane, what if we had to continue circling around the airport, I imagined terrible possibilities of what could happen. Having my daughter with

Planning Time

I read an article last week about Elon Musk, CEO of Telsa, managing his time in 5-minute time intervals. Can you imagine how busy your life must be to plan around 5-minute intervals!? According to the article, Musk even eats his lunch in 5 minutes or less. He believes planning his day into 5 minute slots increases his productivity and allows for an optimized agenda. Knowing that I needed to change the way I manage my time, I thought I should attempt to make a schedule planning my time into intervals too.
I thought if I was going to change my procrastinating ways that I needed to take action about making better use of my time. So I started planning my days into hour-by-hour time slots, including time for playtime with my daughter, yoga classes, morning meditation, and rest. I scheduled 3 hours per day for writing and planned for an earlier bedtime and

Surviving Marriage

All the statistics show that I should be divorced by now. And it’s not like I haven’t thought about it. I’m sure at some point every married person has thought about it or will think about it. If anyone says otherwise I would think they are lying. Marriage is hard work. It’s not like any other relationship I’ve ever been in. At 29 years old, entering into a marriage at 8 months pregnant was insane. On top of the emotional instability that comes along with pregnancy, it was a tumultuous time in our marriage, when it was supposed to be a time of bliss.
My husband and I were struggling with our new roles as mom and dad, when we had yet to solidify our roles as husband and wife. I also was not the nicest person during my pregnancy. It was a difficult transition and one that I wasn’t sure

Re-birthday

Happy Relaunch Day!! I’m so excited to be back with an all new layout, fresh content, and much much more. It’s been over a year since I last updated the site with content and a lot has happened since then. I’ve become a mother, a wife, and an entrepreneur (more on all of that in the weeks to come). Since going through all of these major life transitions, I’ve grown a lot, learned some valuable lessons, and embodied myself more fully.
It was a scary, stressful, and depressing time while going through these transitions, but I survived. It would have been helpful for me to continue writing during that time, but I wasn’t willing to be vulnerable with my experiences. I was going through a normal transition of life, judging myself for experiencing natural emotions and was fearful that everyone else would judge me too. So I didn’t share what I

Hard to Be Different

Last night, BET premiered the 10th Annual Black Girls Rock Awards show. During her acceptance of the Rock Star award, Rihanna encouraged girls to love themselves and accept who they are. Oh, if it was so easy!? Most people don’t even have insight into who they are in order to love themselves. In fact, many people reject parts of themselves out of fear of rejection, ridicule, and shame. Instead we turn a blind eye to the not-so likable parts of ourselves in order to be accepted for someone that we are not. In order to fully love ourselves, we must first recognize and acknowledge the good with the bad.
Unfortunately, we all were born into a world that sends contradictory messages about what it means to be you. We say that it’s what’s on the inside that counts, but what really matters is on the outside. Whole groups of people are

Mind Your Own Business

Social media has created a platform for people to run amuck, proclaim their pettiness, display their ignorance, and showcase a lack of sensitivity and compassion. I wanted to break down the notion of “minding your own business,” especially with the increase of social media drama that has flooded the Internet. “Mind” is an esoteric concept of present and awareness of self. To “mind your own business” essentially means to be aware of self. To be aware of self means to focus on self yet we sometimes get away from this and focus on other people. Relationships are sustained through our ability to trust one another and maintain a sense of loyalty. Chaos and conflict in relationships stem from the lack of one’s capability to mind their own business.
As much as many of us would like to say that we don’t focus on other people’s business, the fact is that anytime

The Lion & the Lamb

I want to be like Rihanna. Okay not really, but I would like to have her attitude. She has this unapologetic, no cares given (read: well you know) attitude that I admire. I used to have this same attitude during my late teens, early twenties; however I did not yet grasp the ability to finesse such a powerful attitude. Let me explain. I approached life with the heart of a lion, willing to tear down and eat up anything that entered into my Kingdom that wasn’t to my liking. I was fearless, brave, and unkind.
Unfortunately this extreme approach towards the world resulted in reckless behavior and broken relationships. I previously wrote about how I lost friends and even family all due to this “My World, My Way” attitude. I was selfish, narcissistic, and careless. It’s one thing to be a lion, but another to recognize that once you step on

Change in Direction

Life is one big movie! It is filled with ups and downs, hills and bumps,
laughter and excitement, joy and sadness. It’s a thriller, suspense,
drama, romance, comedy type of movie. It’ is all the genres packed into
one package that unfolds as your life’s movie. This is your motion
picture. Everything that is happening to you is for your greater good.
All you have to do is sit back and watch from the backseat. We don’t get
to watch it while it’s happening, although that would be great. Instead
we get to reflect back on things after they’ve already occurred,
contemplate different choices, and wonder about if things were
differently. This is the joy and excitement of life. 
There will be times in life that we will be re-routed from the current path in order to take an alternate route. During those moments, it may not appear to be reasonable to steer off course, but there

Free Yourself

In a previous post, The Road to Victory, I wrote about the continuous war that we experience along life’s journey. I did not mention in this post is that this war is an internal battle that takes place within our minds. These battles of the mind are not physical experiences, though it may often seem that way. We are presented with choices in a such a way that allows for us to make our own decisions (free will). Some people continue to make the same choices, taking the easy way out, doing what they’ve always done, and expect to get different results. These people have yet to recognize the instant of their behavior. They have not freed themselves from the bondage of the mind.
The mind is a very complex factor that we do not yet fully understand as human beings. Our minds play tricks on us, working for and against