04 May Celebration of Life: Remembrance of Loved Ones
“When we talk about
death, then we can talk about life.”
During this health crisis, there has been an alarming increase in the number of deaths across the country. Especially in overpopulated areas like New York, New Jersey, and California. There has been a heighten percentage of deaths in metropolitan areas. What has also been disturbing is the way in which we are allowed to grieve the passing of a loved one. Traditional funerals as we know them have been suspended due to new social distancing rules preventing crowds of over five from entering a funeral home. Cemeteries also have restrictions prohibiting any family members from visiting grave sites until further notice.
These new adjustments can be challenging from anyone to adjust to, not just those personally affected by the health crisis. The experience of disconnection between families and their beloved can contribute to a heighten sense of sorrow, sadness, and despair.
Grief, although a normal part of our daily lives, is not an easy process. With the new parameters in place, grief may be extended well beyond the usual grieving period. There may be feelings of guilt, anger and confusion as families strive to make sense of this new “normal.”
The common misconception is that grief is experienced during a span of time and done when that time has passed. It’s viewed as unhealthy or dysfunctional, when grief goes beyond a certain period and most often might be met with suggestions of therapy or some other form of mental health treatment. Instead of finding compassion for the experience of grief, we place judgement on the process of healing.
The process of grief differs for everyone and that includes the span of time in which one manages grief. It’s a process and one that should not be rushed or forced. Providing a safe, non-judgement space for anyone dealing with a loss is the best gift we can give during this season. The absence of a cherished loved one can be a painful memory and cause feelings of depression and sadness to resurface, regardless of the length of time that has passed since their transition.
Far too many people suffer, alone in sadness, without the courage to seek help. Instead they choose to suffer in silence, too afraid to be vulnerable about their feelings and magnitude of the loss on their well-being. The ways in which we celebrate end of life services is being shifted due to the pandemic and as we’re making adjustments to this new normal, we are awakening to new ways of being. Holding on to our past experiences will only prevent us from moving forward and ultimately hold us back from growing into the best version of Self. This is your resurrection.
We do not have to become victims to our feelings of loneliness, heartache, and sadness. Instead we can choose to feel connection and love. What ways can you honor and celebrate your loved one? What traditions can you create that will evoke the spirit of their presence? Are there any favorites (jingles, movies, or games) that your loved on enjoyed? There are many ways that we can honor and celebrate our loved ones by creating a new tradition that will create memories of good times, joy, and celebration. We do not have to feel confined to the parameters in place for end of life services, but instead can choose to celebrate our beloved transition through connection, remembrance, and love.
1.Write a letter: Consider writing a letter to your loved one sharing your feelings, memories, and anything you may feel you want to express. Writing can be very therapeutic and also helps to release the energy from your mind space to travel through the airwaves to the spiritual realm to reach your beloved.
2. Move your body: Movement releasing endorphins, creating new space for energy to flow through your body. The more you move, the more space you will create. Creating space is beneficial to release the emotional energy you are carrying. Move, release, and let it all go.
3. Make peace: Find peace in the way that most resonates with your spirit. Give yourself permission to experience the array of emotions that may occur during your grieving process without judgement. Your process is your own and you can take as much or as little time as you’d like. Trust your process.