Self-love is one of the most widely talked about self-help topics of today. Many authors, singers, and speakers have discussed the importance of self-love. With all the resources available on this topic, one might think there was no room for new materials to be created, nothing more to be said; yet there are still many people struggling with self-love. Could it be that, though there are numerous resources that have been provided, we have yet to implement the tools from those resources to improve our self-love? What has kept us from truly grasping a hold of our being and accepting the totality of who we are?
Self-love is not something that we can attain and then move on to the next thing. Every day we have to make a commitment to love ourselves, wholly, freely, and boldly as we are. When you make a mistake, love yourself; judge someone, love yourself; failed relationship, love yourself; no relationship, love yourself. Self-love is a daily cognitive process that takes place within your being that says, “whatever happens to me today, good, bad, or indifferent, I’m still the best and I love myself.”
Instead of pouring this unconditional, unapologetic love into ourselves, many of us attempt to give it to others with hopes of its’ mutual return. You cannot give that which you do not first have for yourself. To love oneself requires loving the unlovable, unforgivable, and ruthless parts of yourself. You have to be capable of accepting that you are not perfect and realizing that no one is. You are perfectly imperfect just as you are and deserve to be treated with love and respect. When you love yourself wholly, you will not allow anyone, including yourself to treat you with disrespect, disdain, and hatred.
Self-love is the highest form of love that any human being can experience save for the Highest Power. It is not conceited, arrogant, or insolent, but requires a certain level of confidence, strength, and power. Self-love is the willingness to accept the goodness of who you are along with everything else that comes along with it. It is the ability to love yourself wholly, for your flaws, imperfections, doubts, guilt, shame, and failures. Give the love you want to yourself and it will return to you, effortlessly and freely. Love yourself, first!